I Love You Just the Way You Are, Now Change

I like you just the way you are…now change.

Have you ever had one of those conversations where you know no matter what you say you’re going to end up being wrong?

Mr. Chase and I had such a conversation last night. Topic? My weight. I cringe at the just the thought of replaying this conversation in my head again. Ugh. Granted it was my own fault, I mentioned that since we have began dating I have lost about fifteen pounds and we’ll just say the conversation hit the inevitable downward spiral that eventually lead to both of us feeling bad, him for feeling like he had said the wrong thing and me wishing I had never brought it up in the first place.

{I have been relatively the same size since my freshman year of high school. I gained quite a bit of weight after I got married due to the birth control that I was on and when I got pregnant (after being off the aforementioned birth control for a whole year) I lost all the weight I had gained plus 20 lbs. that’s right folks I LosT weight while pregnant! So after having Daisy and getting divorced I have done a pretty good job of keeping the weight off but alas after another bought with a different birth control to help regulate things, I put some of the weight back on and now its time to get rid of it.}

Poor Mr. Chase was asking me questions about my weight-loss and that led to the "Well, how much do you plan on loosing?" question. This is a scary question to me. Why? Because actually setting a goal for this area of my life is frightening. What happens if I can't do it? What if I can? What if I set the bar too high? What if I set the bar too low? How do I go about this? And the questions go on and on.

But its time to suck it up and do something about this stupid fear. I am going to say to ALL of my blog readers. That I am GOING to loose another 25 pounds by the time I graduate (May) I think that seems reasonable and that's not expecting great and miraculous things to magically happen. This can be a gradual thing and that's okay.

PS. Mr Chase told me that he can tell that I've lost some weight. Which is always nice to hear. :)